FORT COLLINS —I was on a walk with my daughters at Pineridge Natural Area near our home when I got a call from a park ranger.
“Is this Chloe’s mother?” said a stern voice on the other end of the line. “We have your daughter here with us. She was found on the trail alone.”
There’s nothing like having your kid taken into protective custody to make you question your parenting decisions.
In the background I could hear my 11-year-old middle schooler protesting, “I’m fine Mama! They made me get in the truck!”
Chloe would later retell in great detail how she got “picked up” after a woman on the trail notified authorities that an adult wasn’t with her.
“I told her that I was fine and that my mom was behind me,” she recounted in a frustrated voice. “But she wouldn’t leave me alone.”
My eldest daughter, like her mother, enjoys being left alone to explore — and I think she should be.
Since they were babies batting at their crib mobile while I was in the other room, I’ve made a point to build independence in my daughters. As they’ve grown, I’ve decreased the amount of supervision as much as my worrying would allow.
Despite my current stance, my parenting has always been more helicopter than free-range. It was only this school year that I began letting my third-grader ride her bike home from school part of the way with her friends instead of having me by her side the whole way. And this season was the first that my sixth-grader was allowed to ski on her own for the better part of the day. I’m still not ready to let them out of my sight by rushing water — or in the Target parking lot, for that matter.
Like the seed sprouts you nurture inside this time of year before gradually increasing their time outside, I’m trying to “harden off” my children before they are permanently out in the world on their own.
They may be just ahead of me on the path at a local natural area today, but in a couple years they will be miles ahead of me on a mountainous bike trail, in five years they can drive to different states solo. And in less than 10 years, they will be riding the Metro in Paris with me a continent away.
And then, girls, as the great Dr. Seuss would say, “Oh, the places you’ll go.”
I calculate the risks with each loosening of the apron strings. I chose Pineridge that Saturday because you can see most points of the 1.8-mile loop from most other parts of the trail. And because it’s a loop, there’s no way to miss a turn. But most of all I chose Pineridge because there’s so much to discover.
A t the base of the foothills, right before the climb to Horsetooth Reservoir, it has a small reservoir of its own that’s home to a variety of birds, fish and turtles. There’s a swath of forest where we’ve often startled deer and a prairie full of wildflowers and, well, prairie dogs.
Chloe has always liked to hike faster than the rest of the family, with just her thoughts as company.
Do I worry when she’s out exploring on her own? Every time. But I worry more about my daughters growing up fearful of our awe-inspiring world and missing out on the benefits of being alone in it.
There have been many studies showing that constant supervision robs children of the opportunity to learn important life skills, such as self-sufficiency and decision making (visit freerangekids.com to see some of them).
We are lucky in Fort Collins to have 34,696 acres of natural areas open to the public (info at fcgov.com/naturalareas/) . This summer, bring your family up to visit some of them — or seek out new adventures closer to home.
Either way, if you decide it’s time for your children to explore on their own, trust your gut and make sure your phone is on.
Chryss Cada is a freelance writer and journalism instructor at Colorado State University. Visit her at chryss.com.
